If we're being honest, there really isn't a Christmas movie like National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. It's eclectic, it's odd, and it's by far one of the funniest Christmas movies out there! In fact, watching the flick is a Christmas activity that some families may even consider an annual holiday tradition at this point—it's just that movie! We won't gush too much, though. You get the point! However, what we will say is that there are plenty of iconic Christmas quotes that have come from this movie. So, as we head into the holiday season, we thought we'd lay out a list of our favorite ones!
The quotes on this list are hilarious, a little weird, and shockingly relatable (for some). This one from Audrey is so funny that we can't help but to let out a little laugh: "Would it be indecent to ask the grandparents to stay at a hotel?" Yes, Audrey, it would be indecent! 😂 Others on this list are just straight up memorable, like this one from Rusty: "Mom? This box is meowing."
Use these Christmas Vacation movie quotes to make a funny Christmas Instagram caption, fill out a Christmas card, or win Christmas trivia. You're sure to have the "hap-hap-happiest Christmas" ever!
Clark Griswold Movie Quotes
"Amen!" — Clark Griswold
"Honey, they're family—not strangers off the street." — Clark
"Going for a new amateur recreational saucer sled land speed record—Clark W. Griswold Jr.!" — Clark
"Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!" — Clark
"Later, dudes!" — Clark
"I was just looking at something for my wife, God rest her soul." — Clark
"Wouldn't be the holiday shopping season if the stores weren't hooter than they—hotter than they are." — Clark
"We're gonna have the hap-hap-happiest Christmas." — Clark
"Hallelujah! Where’s the Tylenol?" — Clark
"Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?" — Clark
"Eat my road grit, Liver Lips!" — Clark
"It's good. It's good." — Clark
"It's not going in our yard, Russ. It's going in our living room." — Clark
"It's a one-year membership to the Jelly of the Month Club." — Clark Griswold
"Take a look around you, Ellen! We're at the threshold of Hell!" — Clark
Cousin Eddie Movie Quotes
"That's a honey of a tree, Clark." — Cousin Eddie
"I borrowed it off a buddy of mine. He took my house, I took the RV." — Cousin Eddie
"You serious, Clark?" — Cousin Eddie
"Clark, that's the gift that keeps on giving the whole year." — Cousin Eddie
"Here's a little list - alphabetical, starting with Catherine." — Cousin Eddie
"You better take a rain check on that, Art—he’s got a lip fungus they ain’t identified yet." — Cousin Eddie
"If this gets dented, then my hair just ain't gonna look right." — Cousin Eddie
Funny Christmas Vacation Movie Quotes
"Clark, we're stuck under a truck!" — Ellen
"Grace? She died 30 years ago!" — Aunt Bethany
"The BLESSSSING." — Uncle Lewis
"Mom? This box is meowing." — Rusty
"I hope nobody I know drives by and sees me standing in the yard staring at the house in my pajamas." — Audrey
"She’ll see it later honey, her eyes are frozen shut."— Ellen
"You just march over there and slug that creep in the face." — Margo Chester
"I love it here. You don't gotta put on your coat to go to the bathroom, and your house is always parked in the same place!" — Ruby Sue
"Welcome to our home—what's left of it." — Ellen
"Whoa, geez! Look at the time. I gotta get to bed—and brush my teeth, feed the hog, do the laundry, wash the car, still got some homework to do." — Rusty
"Hurry up, Clark. I'm freezing my baguettes off." — Grandpa Art
"Would it be indecent to ask the grandparents to stay at a hotel?" — Audrey
"You couldn’t hear a dump truck driving through a nitroglycerin plant." — Uncle Lewis
"Clark, Audrey's frozen from the waist down." — Ellen
"And why is the carpet all wet, Todddddd?" — Margo Chester
"I don't know, Margoooo!" — Todd Chester
"I don't know what to say, but it's Christmas and we're all in misery." — Ellen
"He read that squirrels are high in cholesterol." — Catherine
"Do you hear it? It's a funny, squeaky sound!" — Aunt Bethany
"I’m sorry, this is our family’s first kidnapping." — Ellen
"We're not driving all the way out here so you can get one of those stupid ties with Santa Clauses on it, are we, Dad?" — Audrey
"Is your house on fire, Clark?" — Aunt Bethany
"What is it? A letter confirming your reservation at the nuthouse?" — Grandpa Art
"Clark, stop it. I don’t want to spend the holidays dead." — Ellen
Kelly O'Sullivan
Senior Editor
Kelly O’Sullivan is the senior editor for The Pioneer Woman and manages the website’s social channels, in addition to overseeing content strategy and news.
